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Melissa;LI, New York;Punk Rock✌️

18 months with my love and king💕👑💩


i saw a white boy playing an acoustic guitar on his porch so i yelled at him “play wonderwall” and he said he never heard of that song god what’s the fucking point of white boys if u can’t even make fun of them

(via going-down-the-rabbit-hole)



my dad had surgery today so he is kind of high off his pain meds and he keeps telling me “get me a ham sandwich” and i’m like “no dad we don’t eat ham.. we’re jews’ he goes “ham… ham sandwich please” “dad no no, no ham..” 

now he’s just reading from the dessert menu and my mom is telling him “your doctor said no sugar or anything too heavy…” and he’s going “this is so unfair! this is so unfair to me!”

(via going-down-the-rabbit-hole)


that one person everyone loves and you’re just like




(via iwasshotgunrunningaway)



english is not my first language and all my life i thought brussel sprouts was the name of some celebrity

everyone is always like “i hate brussel sprouts” and all this time i was here thinking what the fuck did that poor guy do

(via going-down-the-rabbit-hole)


it’s really funny bc like listening to english majors talk about their classes or projects theyre really articulate and they use complex words and stuff and it’s very prestigious sounding and then you listen to science majors and if theyre just talking amongst themselves it sounds more like “yeah i put the compound in the thing and honestly i was hoping for a little boom but all i got was a sizzle i dont know what i did wrong.”

(via lostinthatdreamland)


honestly my dad is such a freak he never says goodnight like a normal person he just says “i’ll be back” and he goes upstairs and when you ask where he is or go looking for him hes asleep and the next morning when you see him he just says “good morning im back’ like what is wrong with him

(via going-down-the-rabbit-hole)